To Love or to be In Love

I commented on a post over at "goodgirlbadplace" about the difference between loving somebody and being in love with them. What I said (verbatim) was:

Until I met Sara, I didn't have a clue that there was even a difference between loving, and being 'in love'. But Sara sure did. Even though she knew I loved her, and I had told her many times, it wasn't until I uttered the words "in love" with her that caused her to totally commit herself to me. That really surprised me, but then a lightbulb went on, and I realized what that difference was.

So how does one know when they are 'in love' with somebody? I'm sure its different with everybody, but for me it was when I finally understood why people wrote poetry. And why love songs were written. And when my heart ached even more for Sara the more deeply I fell in love with her, I realized that was the final indicator for me. Yes, for me, my heart aches when I love her, and it also aches when I'm hurt by her. Needless to say, it aches most of the time. For Sara, she has confessed to me that her heart aches more when she loves me, then when I've hurt her. I'm not sure how that's possible, but that might explain why she tries to walk away so many times.