Here Today, Gone Tomorrow?
Sara surfaced yesterday after remaining quiet for about 3 weeks. But an email she left me last night has me wondering if she's gone already.
i've changed haven't i? i used to bounce back after disappointments, after fights,etc. i'm not bouncing back & there seems to be another one on top of another one. they're uncontrollable disappointments but they are still disappointments. the hurt, the pain, the disappointments are far outweighing the happiness.
i know i can here you right now. lol "cause u don't ever let me see you. let me tell you i love u in person. etc. etc. etc." it hasn't been that long ago - you remember what those times do to me.
i feel like i've said this a 100 different ways (i actually have). this time i'll only say ---- "please forgive me."
What threw me for a loop was her last sentence. If it said "please do the right thing and close down the email.", then the email makes sense. I was expecting that. But to apologize? For what? That was totally unexpected. Then it hit me this morning. She ran out of ways to tell me, so instead she's hoping I forgive her for leaving - once again.
Since this is the week when she will start having some free time, I think she surfaced only to let me know she's not in the right place - for me. I'm just curious if she'll just go back to hiding, or if she will really make an attempt to stop reading my emails. Time will tell.
i've changed haven't i? i used to bounce back after disappointments, after fights,etc. i'm not bouncing back & there seems to be another one on top of another one. they're uncontrollable disappointments but they are still disappointments. the hurt, the pain, the disappointments are far outweighing the happiness.
i know i can here you right now. lol "cause u don't ever let me see you. let me tell you i love u in person. etc. etc. etc." it hasn't been that long ago - you remember what those times do to me.
i feel like i've said this a 100 different ways (i actually have). this time i'll only say ---- "please forgive me."
What threw me for a loop was her last sentence. If it said "please do the right thing and close down the email.", then the email makes sense. I was expecting that. But to apologize? For what? That was totally unexpected. Then it hit me this morning. She ran out of ways to tell me, so instead she's hoping I forgive her for leaving - once again.
Since this is the week when she will start having some free time, I think she surfaced only to let me know she's not in the right place - for me. I'm just curious if she'll just go back to hiding, or if she will really make an attempt to stop reading my emails. Time will tell.
posted by do_in_it_2 | 8:30 AM
4 Comments:
Hey, just wondered how you are doing??? I have missed you. See you are still on the rollercoaster :(
xoxo
TME
time to get off don't ya think?
Something made me come here today to read this........
I really like the title of this post. It rings a bell close to home with me. I also like your weblog. It rings another bell close to me. Now I've these bells ringing all around me. I must comment.
So, not to get too crazy with all the bells, so I'll mention a whistle. The theme reminds me of a time in my own life similar to yours now, but before email. I don't think that "relationship" would have lasted as long as yours with such instant communication available.
I'm tired. I'm going to bed. I'm going to stop reading other's blogs, for now I've found a blog from you. Very nice. Please, irregardless of what happens, don't stop blogging. It's nice to find something/one with all the bells and whistles. Yes?
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