4 Weeks.
I had no idea its been almost 2 weeks since I last left a post. Obviously I've been extremely busy, but had no idea how busy. Well, today will be 4 weeks since I last talked with Sara. I have to admit that I don't think as much about her anymore. That's due in part to being so busy, but also from re-discovering the life I had before she came around. But when I do think about her, I get more emotional now inside. My longing for her is much stronger than ever. Overall I'm still in a good place with her, but its not the perfect place I'd hope to be. Just writing this post is bringing back a huge wave of emotions - mostly good, but some bad. But if I were asked today which I'd rather have - the stability of things as they are now, or the instability of things as they were with Sara - I'd say its a toss up at this point.
posted by do_in_it_2 | 6:24 AM
3 Comments:
Being female, and in almost the same situation (we haven't seen each other in four weeks), it's hard to hear you think of her less. I guess that's easier for guys. She's probably hoping for a sign from you. But if you're not sure which you want? Who knows. Just my two cents.
B--
I'm pretty certain I don't think of her as much because I've become soo busy. And I think the reason my emotions are so much more stronger (than before) when I do, it's because of that mental/emotional absence building up.
There is no doubt that I want her back in my life. I'm just not sure if I can handle those ups and downs anymore. But its makes no matter what I want. If she comes back, I'll be there for her.
But if she comes back, DII2, it -will- be with the roller coaster and drama and angst and emotions. I think that not thinking of her as much is a mentally healthy way to deal with the reality that you're not speaking and that you, at the least, needed the space to see what life's like without the gripping nature of the drama that is an affair. --VM--
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